I didn’t write much last week. Frankly, I couldn’t bring myself to do it and take away time from my family. My heart was just too heavy. Last week, my grandmother entered hospice and passed away a few days later. She died peacefully in her sleep surrounded by her family. There are a few things that I’m grateful for in this situation….
1) We made it in time to spend a good day and a half with her while she was lucid, talking, and enjoying our company.
2) She’s not in any more pain, and she was surrounded by people that love her.
3) She was loved by many
4) She’s in heaven now
but that’s not really the reason for this blog. The real reason I wrote the blog is this….
Hospice gave us this little document while she was still lucid, and when I read it, the profoundness of it just blew me away. It said:
5 Things Your Loved One Needs to Know Before Dying
1) My life has meaning and purpose: my life will be celebrated and remembered
2) I am sorry. I am forgiven: give the opportunity to seek forgiveness, ask for forgiveness and receive forgiveness.
3) I am loved.
4) My family and loved ones will be ok: need to know you will keep being a family, keep living your lives, and take care of each other.
5) I have the permission and blessings of my loved ones to pass on when it is my time: my loved ones will not be angry or mad at me for physically leaving them.
Ultimately, we have one life, and it is a short one. The days seem long most of the time, but the years fly by. We all think we have more time on this Earth than we actually do. She was given 3-6 months to live and died in 5 days.
Tomorrow is not promised, so imagine if we all lived our lives giving the grace, and compassion to our loved ones that are listed in the 5 things above. What a different loving world we would live in. Don’t let your precious time go to waste. Be present with your loved ones, be intentional, make time for them, forgive them, focus on loving them well. Choose joy because we never know when it’s our time.
In memory of Elsbeth B. Emmons- Beloved wife, mother, and everyone’s Omi.